I can hear some lovely stuff in here, Caring.  To my untrained ear there seem to be a lot of things competing for my attention all at once.  Maybe a bit of adjustment on some of the volume levels at various stages might allow each part a turn to shine.  It's a rich, velvety sound you've put together, with loads of potential.  That's only my personal take on it, and to put it in perspective - I'm not a musician.